What NOT to do while skydiving: Jump with a tandem as a new jumper. Start backflying after the tandem has deployed at 5,000ft. Go for the dock no matter what the altitude. Fly over the top of your mate at 2,000ft. Ignore your altimeter at 1,800ft. Take the time to wave off (to who!?) at 800ft. Shudder. My eyes were closed by the time it came to the downplane at 500ft. NEVER try this shit at home. Like, ever.