We can all agree skydiving is a bloody good time, but this is a bit too much. Spin spin spin, spin stop, bloody mess. That about sums up this gem. I'm not sure if this instructor broke his nose, but with the amount of blood squirting from it, it sure looks like he did. If you've ever had any full-contact freefall injuries, tell us about it in the comments.

Hey... hey, bro... you alright? Wwwhhaaat... yeah, I'm good.

At a dropzone somewhere in Middle Earth, one skydiver did pitch his pilot chute through a loop of shock cord on his jacket. Holy horsehoe, Batman! With his reserve pilot chute entangled in the risers and the canopy turning, he makes a heroic effort to straighten it out before landing. We love happy endings to malfunctions... good work!

Instead of a tried and true ski-BASE exit, Dennis Ohlsen opted to ride a sled off the edge of a snowy cliff. Sure, a fun idea in theory... until your sled gets stuck on the edge, sending you off said cliff with almost no forward speed. Dennis comes incredibly close to the cliff in his first few seconds of freefall, but luckily he escapes without a scratch.

The thing with gravity is that she just can't wait to introduce you to her friend -- the ground. You know how hard it is to be introduced to new people, too fast. It's hard. Very hard.

Remember the SoFPiDaRF rules, people: safety third! At first I thought this is what a pond swoop was supposed to look like. Turns out I was wrong. If only he was half a second earlier, it would've been an epic swoop! Ok, more like 4 seconds. D'you see what happens when you use toggles? :p

It's hard to tell from this angle just how close this BASE jumper was from pounding in, but it looks like he was seconds away from impact. He's lucky he didn't fumble his PC, like this guy.

"Somebody call 411. This guy needs to get a clue." Lol. Since Gerardo Flores has been ostracized by the skydiving community for the dumbest malfunction ever, the late Jhonathan Florez created this hilarious parody of a 'choo lace' malfunction. Damn strings! I highly recommend watching the original "malfunction" video first before watching this.

This is by far the DUMBEST "malfunction" in skydiving history! Period. We all know how much damage a Category 5 hurricane can cause. Well Gerardo Flores is a Category 5 idiot! Watching this video actually makes me quite angry, but here's the breakdown: 30 jumps (in 2 years??!!), wearing a GoPro with only 30 jumps (WTF??!!), then "ee jus 'sploded" at 13,000 feet. The problem here is "you never pull above 6,000 feet" (right??!!) because "ees super high", then he considered chopping a perfectly good canopy (WTF??!!) and then randomly passes out even though he looked pretty awake and alert to me (yet he remained unconscious for 2 weeks afterwards??!!). And then, finally, and magically, he managed to land on the dropzone... unconscious??!! Unless I'm missing something, this story makes NO sense. Well done Gerardo, looks like you got your 15 minutes of fame. And now, let's hear your thoughts in the comments... let the feeding frenzy begin...